Overheard

Alyssa: "Peter Pan!"

Jaden: "Peed her pants?"

Alyssa: "Peter Pan!"

Jaden: "Peed her panties?"

Alyssa: "PETER PAN!"

Jaden. "Oh! Peed her pants."

The Princess & the Pop Star

I have to admit this Halloween was a bit tougher than usual, what with Amanda doing that really annoying thing... thinking for herself.

It was probably in July or August that we started talking about Halloween costumes. Amanda told me she wanted to be Hannah Montana and I thought to myself there's plenty of time to change her mind.

I wasn't particularly thrilled with that choice of costume for a few reasons… one being that my baby is far too young to be dressing like a teenage pop star. Another being that I'm rather old fashioned I guess, because I prefer easily recognizable costumes for kids, something more classic and timeless. And lastly, my BABY is far too young to be dressing like a teenage pop star. Yeah I know. I had to say that twice. Oh, and did I mention that the costume she wanted was $50? Fifty dollars for this totally cheap looking thing?!?

So for months I tried gently swaying her. Then I tried not so gently swaying her. I tossed out every single great idea I could think of, along with a whole bunch of not so great ones. But she wasn't budging. I like to get their costumes early, so I don't have to worry about it. But there we were only ten days before Halloween and she still hadn't decided. Well clearly she had decided, but I was still trying to pretend she hadn't. When I asked her for the 3,458^th time what she wanted to be for Halloween, her chin dropped and she said ever so sadly, "I don't know Mommy, I just don't know. Because there's only one thing I really, really want to be and you don't want me to be that."

Yep, I caved. Ordered the costume that day. And no, I didn't pay anywhere close to $50 for it. Which was good because she barely ended up wearing any of it. The leggings were see-through and the "dress" just barely covered her behind. The belt was awful and she hated the wig. So I insisted she wear a skirt and her own leggings. We used the dress as a top. The night before her Halloween party at school I discovered a huge rip under the arm on the jacket. Really? She'd only tried the thing on for a few minutes.

When Amanda saw the hole, she was seconds away from dissolving into tears so I put on my competent-Mom-face and told her I could fix it. No, I didn't actually believe I could fix it but I couldn't tell her that, could I? Much to the dismay of my mother, who is a master seamstress, I am completely unskilled in that area. Completely unskilled. So I did what the slightly less competent moms do and I got out the duct tape. Well they say you can fix anything with it, don't they? It worked too. Worked just fine until she put the jacket on and we heard this awful ripping sound. Her lip started quivering so again, I said, "Hey, no worries, I can totally fix this." Inside my head there was a lot of swearing going on but I couldn't tell her that, could I?

I finally managed to track down a needle but I couldn't find anything but black thread. When you're extremely bad at sewing, the last thing you want to do is draw attention to the fact by using the wrong color thread. I knew I had to have white thread somewhere but after a very long search and nearly giving up, I suddenly remembered... dental floss! Yup, I totally pulled a McGyver on the Hannah Montana costume from hell. It probably took me at least three times longer than it should have but I actually did a pretty darn good job on it. I'm not sure my mom would have been impressed but I totally was.

So Amanda was Hannah Montana… well no, actually she decided that without the blonde wig she would be Miley Cyrus. If you're not up on the Disney Channel and the whole Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana thing, just ask Amanda. If you wanna know about McGyver, ask me.

Alyssa was supposed to be the easy one this year. I knew anything pretty and sparkly and girly would make her happy so I was planning to put her in the princess dress Amanda wore years ago when Alyssa was just a little pea. It's been hanging in the closet for years, staring at me, just waiting to be worn again.

Except that when I went to get it so Alyssa could try it on, it had somehow managed to drop off the face of the earth. I couldn't find it anywhere. I was so desperate to find it that I reorganized the whole closet and every drawer in the place. If you know me at all, you'll sense the desperation in that move. But still, no princess dress.

Then one night I overheard Alyssa telling Scott that she was going to be Sleeping Beauty for Halloween because if she was Sleeping Beauty she could take a nap. Well that settled that. I didn't even know she knew who Sleeping Beauty was but I wasn't going to argue with napping logic.

So that's how we ended up with a princess and a pop star.